Seeing Yourself Anew
What’s New?
I have been thinking a lot about what’s “new” about the new year. After all, this is a time to consider how we might want to reinvent ourselves. Or take our life in a new direction. Or maybe we just want to color our day with some new approaches or take a moment here and there to dive into some new ideas, new material, or new content. All of these things certainly feature in my #squadgoals any day of the year, but I am especially conscious of this at the beginning of the year when I want to see myself anew. I am most palpably aware now, in the first days of the new year, just how consciously I am trying to grow into myself.
I’m also palpably aware of what’s working for me and what I need to Click Replace on (check out my TikTok on Gut-Check 4 for more on that). When I look into myself to do this work, I often go through a series of emotional reactions before I can let go of the old and bring in the new. Denial, defensiveness, shame…any of this sound familiar? The only reason why I can move beyond these negative responses to a sinking feeling that something isn’t working for me is because of my sociological imagination—that inner wisdom that tells me that all that stuff that needs replacing that seems internal, personal, private, a.k.a. “my fault,” is really external, social, shared, and way beyond just lil ole me.
Rethinking Individuality
I spent the last year writing about this with regard to one specific topic: intelligence. My upcoming book Rethinking Intelligence talks about the cultural narrative of intelligence that has been peddled and pressed on us for way too long, inspiring us to see ourselves in a limited way. In this narrative, there are genetic winners and losers. We are either gifted and talented, mentally mediocre, or incapacitated and inept.
And sadly, science is to blame. Despite all the credit social and emotional learning has gotten in the span of my lifetime, there is still an influential corner of science that gives credence to this narrative. As a result, we still have a faulty lens for seeing our own worth.
So this year, in addition to Clicking Replace on this false narrative, I want to do the work for myself, for my kids, with my crew, and with my followers to really dispel the notion that we are only so good. It’s what I call a “score mentality.” Tests tell us we amount to a certain number. But tests are mere artifacts. They are made by people who want to rank and compare us, to deem some of us winners and others losers. What tests don’t tell us is that there are always going to be people who are more familiar with test materials and better prepared to rank high. So instead of supporting this mentality, I will work to help us see ourselves anew—as inherently different and incomparable, but also collaborative and connected. We are radically individual yet radically interdependent.
What’s News?
I am also adding a new avenue of connection with you via the DRB Newsletter. In it, I will share curated lists of recommended reads, a wrap of my month in videos, and exclusive content related to my latest book, out April 11. If you are enjoying peeping this blog, then sign up and join me for a closer look!